We will be packed Thursday night for the 2nd Annual Hide the Hooch Party. Get here early. Celebrate the Largest Liquor Seizure in Monroe County's History.
Two years ago, due to a malfunction in a certain new Key West bar's paperwork, an alphabet soup of Federal Agencies raided a poor little Country Bar which had been open for just a few nano-seconds at its new location.
When I say raid, I mean they came in with tanks, machine gunners, armored vehicles and jet planes, lots and lots of jet planes.
The strafing and napalming of the bar wasn't the bad part. Nor were the grenades, mortar rounds, and bartenders screaming "Incoming!" No, the heartbreaking part of this piece of Key West History is the mean old Feds swept in and carted off every single bottle of beer, every bottle of booze, every case of wine.
At the end of the raid, all the poor bar owners and staff had to go elsewhere to drink away their loss. When people can't drink in their own bar . . . cause the bar has no booze . . . let me tell you, that's Hard Times, folks!
Any other bar would have faded like a pissed on newspaper lying in the fetid seaweed on a Smather's Beach shoreline. But not this bar. This bar is tougher than the rest. After tens of thousands of just bought inventory had been carted off by the Feds for parties at the White House, Langley, Crawford Texas and a certain game preserve where men get drunk and shoot birds from cars, this little bar which thought it could, pulled its jeans up from its royal hosing, and said, "Let's show this town what we are made of."
Hence, the little bar went out and procured and secured a real liquor license which no one could deny, not even a Jolly Good Fellow from a governmental agency.
Since then, this weird ass Country Bar has in two short years become an "anchor" in an area of Duval Street where every 200 block bar owner, bartender, waitress, or security guy said "It'll never work down there!"
In honor of those who believed, and who stuck it out during the worst of times, Cowboy Bill's Honky Tonk Saloon is going to celebrate the largest liquor seizure in Monroe County History by giving you 12 hours of Happy Hour this Thursday Night, 4 PM til 4 AM.
You'll drink 2 fer 1 wells, 2 fer 1 draught beers, and 2 fer 1 domestic bottles. On top of that, the number one seller in the bar . . . Jagermeister . . . will be reduced from its ridiculously already low prices to $4.00 a shot and $5.00 a Jagerbomb.
Personally, I think the owners are out of their everloving Cowboy and Cowgirl hats offering overworked locals a 12 hour happy hour. It means no one will show up to work on Friday and we'll be blamed at every business in town for short staffing them. You know what? So what? Let's party like Castro just died and prices are 1975.
Get here early. Claim your spot. Get ready to rock to a great Texas Country Band: the James Lann Band.
Be here early to claim your seats.
Til we meet over a cold one,
DJ Rowdy signing off as I'm at work now writing this after another jammed packed Sexy Bullriding Contest tonight, Wednesday.
If you're up reading this before 4:00 AM, remember, we're always open til 4:00 AM with the latest last call in Key West.
We never close early.
Never.
And we never say die.
Yours in Red Stripe,
Reverend DJ Rowdy Yates
"In hominy grits Uneeda Biscuit . . . Et cum spirit Cowboy Bill's!"
